say something nice

Posted on August 11, 2016 by Barry

“Gossip is the Devil’s Radio.”

-George Harrison, member of The Beatles

Image from giantbomb.com

I clearly recall my parents emphasizing the adage, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” Unfortunately, this altruistic idea is difficult when we desire to belong and fit in with our various communities.

Using the radio metaphor, where do you stand in your willingness to receive destructive transmissions? When do you initiate them? Given our hyper-connected social media world, these messages can spread like wildfire.

EXERCISE:

What if you choose to be an angel – rather than a devil- by sharing only positive, affirming messages today? What would be possible if we all engaged in this approach?

The Best Preparation for Tomorrow

Posted on June 23, 2016 by Barry

“The best preparation for tomorrow is doing your best today.”

—H. Jackson Brown, Jr. author of Life’s Little Instruction Book

Image from skimbacolifestyle.com

Virtually everyone entering into a coaching relationship desires a better future. They want to go beyond ordinary, to achieve EXTRA-ordinary results and relationships in all aspects of their lives.

Doing your best and going the extra mile today is one sure bet that you will be further down the road when you take your first steps tomorrow morning.

EXERCISE:

Examine the following areas of your life to decide what extra attention and effort you will take to support your better tomorrow:

Health	Relationships	Community
Learning/Skill Development	Family	Balance
Work	Spiritual Growth	Hobbies/avocations

Make the commitment: reply to this post to let me know what actions you plan to take.

Friday Review: Character

Posted on March 4, 2016 by Barry

Friday Review: Character

Here are a few posts related to Character you may have missed. Click on the links to read the full message.

“Character is revealed by action, action is motivated by character.”

“The true test of a man’s character is what he does when no one is watching.”

“Easy Street is a blind alley.”

Small Minds

Posted on December 31, 2015 by Barry

“Don’t let small minds convince you that your dreams are too big.”

-Zig Ziglar, late American author and motivational speaker

image from theproductivtypro.com

Who are some of the small-minded people in your personal or professional worlds? What qualities or characteristics have you assigned to them? See how many of the following qualities describe those who appear to have diminishing or completely crushing the dreams of others as their purpose:

Antagonistic	Righteous	Fear-Based
Condescending	Oppositional	Aloof
Perfectionism	Judgmental	Overly Aggressive
Controlling	Critical	Unethical
Combative	Wishy-Washy	Disrespectful
Temperamental	Pessimistic	Arrogant
Volatile	Uncooperative	Dishonest

EXERCISE:

How can you reduce or eliminate the small-minded people in your world, and replace them or attract more big-minded people to support your biggest personal and professional dreams?

Consider making a list of the big-minded qualities and characteristics to help you recognize these folks when you meet or see them.

Won’t Change You

Posted on December 22, 2015 by Barry

“If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you.”

—Fred Devito, American Yoga Instructor

Image from londonpowertunnels.co.uk

What areas of your personal or professional life would you most like to change for the better? How long have you wanted these changes in your life? If your answer is “far longer than I care to admit,” a new approach will be required.

The New Year is just around the corner and a high percentage of people will be looking to resolve or achieve far more this time around.

One key to this success is to choose only a small number of challenging objectives that will cause you to stretch and grow, and to garner many more social and structural sources of support to virtually guarantee your success.

EXERCISE:

List one or two challenging goals for the New Year. Display them in multiple places in your personal and professional worlds. Solicit the rigorous support of a coach, mentor, family member, or friend, who will not give up on you to assure the lasting changes and results you desire.

Once this has occurred, select another priority goal and repeat the process, to have your best year yet!

What You Want Most

Posted on December 14, 2015 by Barry

“Don’t give up what you want the most for what you want right now.”

-attributed to Peter Rossomando, Head Football Coach at CCSU

Image from wtvr.com

A characteristic shared by many of the most successful people is their ability to delay gratification in order to achieve their most highly desired objectives.

In the late 60s/early 70s Stanford University psychologist Walter Mischel did a study in which children ages four to six were given the choice between one marshmallow provided immediately, or two marshmallows if they waited for 15 minutes. In follow-up studies, the researchers found that those who were able to wait longer for the preferred rewards tended to have better life outcomes.

EXERCISE:

What disciplined actions, behaviors, and habits must you develop in order to resist short-term wants so that you can realize your most cherished and valued priorities?

Perseverance

Posted on October 30, 2015 by Barry

“Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after the other.”

—Walter Elliot, 19th Century Scottish Politician

Image from timemanagementninja.com

My daughter Rachel is one of the hardest working, most persevering people I know.

Over a six-year period during college and a few years beyond, she was involved in a 12-week summer sales program in which she worked over 80 hours each week.

Despite many challenges including bad weather, barking dogs, and of course, tons of rejection, she was committed to selling high-quality educational products. She broke her day into two-hour manageable blocks of time, which helped her manage her efforts in small short races, instead of being overwhelmed by the long road ahead.

EXERCISE:

How can you use Rachel’s strategy – running many short races one after the other – to demonstrate the perseverance you need to win your most important personal and professional races?

“The book that will most change…”

Posted on October 1, 2015 by Barry

“The book that will most change your life is the book you write.”

—Seth Godin, American author and entrepreneur

QC Book Cover

It has been just over a year since I published The Quotable Coach – Daily Nuggets of Practical Wisdom. The process, from my first blog post to published book, took over two-and-a-half years.

I have always loved quotes. I enjoy the inner journey as I look at my own life. The 30 months of developing the book were far different in that I found myself digging deeper, and wrestling more fully than ever before. It was, without question, the extra efforts that resulted in the most profound gains I’ve experienced, professionally and personally.

EXERCISE:

If you were to write a book that would result in substantial growth, what would be the topic? How can you begin this process today? Possible first steps could be a journal entry, a blog post, or a short story.

The Person You Want

Posted on August 7, 2015 by Barry

“Be the kind of person you want in your life.”

—Author Unknown

Image from picturespider.com

When you got up this morning, brushed your teeth, washed your face, and looked in the mirror, who did you see? What were your thoughts about the person staring back at you? For the moment, leave out any and all references to your physical features and appearance.

Instead, focus only on those inner qualities that make you who you are. Consider the following qualities to start, and add a few of your own:

Optimistic	Dependable	Cooperative
Honest	Respectful	Creative
Integrity	Open-Minded	Courageous
Hard-Working	Caring	Brave
Loyal	Service-Minded	Bold
Friendly	Helpful	Affectionate
Trustworthy	Generous	Loving
Responsible	Productive	Kind

EXERCISE:

How will you, today and in the future, become even more of the kind of person you want in your life? Consider sharing your intentions with selective people—those you respect and admire for their wonderful qualities—to help hold you accountable for being the best version of yourself possible.

“Your smile is your logo…”

Posted on August 6, 2015 by Barry

“Your smile is your logo. Your personality is your business card. How you leave others feeling after having an experience with you becomes your trademark.”

—Jay Danzie, Success in Progress Inc.

Image from successfulandfit.com

Examine your personal and professional lives. Are the people in your communities buying what you are selling? Personal branding has been attributed to success in these domains, when it is done with sincerity and authenticity.

The quote “People do business with those they know, like, and trust” is attributed to Bob Burg, author of “Endless Referrals.” Take a look at those around you, specifically at your most trusted friends and advisors. How do their smiles, personalities, and the way they make you feel in their presence create that special enduring loyalty?

EXERCISE:

Go out of your way today to smile more often, share your most winning personality traits, and be sure to leave everyone you meet better off because of the time you spent together.