Category Archives: Coaching

Find Good Support

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“Don’t wait for someone to take you under their wing. Find a good wing and climb up underneath it.”

—Frank C. Bucard, Author of The Trust Puzzle

Image from Flickr by Savannah Sam Photography

Image from Flickr by Savannah Sam Photography

We all need help if we are to fly high and far.

Think back to the recent Olympics in Brazil, and consider the social supports in place for each athlete. Beyond their coaches, there were friends, family, mentors, and sports psychologists directing their efforts toward personal excellence.

In the event you do not have your own team of supportive individuals lined up to encourage and uphold you, begin today to seek them out, and choose the very best. With a champion’s spirit and effort, both you and those with “good wings” will benefit greatly.

EXERCISE:

Once your “A” team of supportive individuals are on board, take the initiative to spread your own wings for others to climb underneath.

Threshold of your Mind

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“The teacher who is indeed wise does not bid you to enter the house of his wisdom, but rather, leads you to the threshold of your mind.”

-Kahlil Gibran, Lebanese-American artist, poet, and writer

image from itu.edu

image from itu.edu

Take a moment to get into an imaginary time machine and go back to your youth.

Specifically, I’d like you to visit your grammar school, middle school, high school, college, and if you had them, post-graduate educational experiences.

As you explore each of these periods in your life, take note of the teachers who have made the most memorable and lasting impact on your life. How many of them challenged your thinking and encouraged greater personal inquiry, rather than simply pouring their reservoir of knowledge into you?

EXERCISE:

Who are the current teachers, mentors, and coaches that lead you to expand the threshold of your mind? How can you be such a resource for others in your personal and professional communities?

From the Errors of Others

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“From the errors of others, a wise man corrects his own.”

—Publilius Syrus, ancient Syrian writer

QC #906

A highly notable technique to support personal growth and development is to encourage people to embrace failure. When we fail, we have the opportunity to pick up experiential lessons from the event.

Today’s quote, however, suggests that not all lessons need to occur from our own failures, setbacks, and stumbles. All we need do is pay particular attention to the misadventures of those around us. From them, we can glean additional nuggets of knowledge and wisdom.

Given the fact that there is only one of you, and so many people in your personal and professional worlds, the odds favor the open and receptive mind in picking up a higher proportion of lessons this way.

EXERCISE:

Where and in what ways can you use the errors of others to pursue greater success and mastery throughout your day?

Help. Other. People. Evolve.

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Help. Other. People. Evolve. (HOPE)

—Author Unknown

Photo from Flickr by GotCredit

Photo from Flickr by GotCredit

One of the main reasons I enjoy the coaching profession is that it is a very hopeful way of relating with others. We are constantly exploring new and different approaches to better our lives and have a more fulfilling future.

To this end, I encourage you to pursue the two-way street of being a coach for others and having a variety of coaches to support your own evolving life.

EXERCISE:

Identify one of your unique abilities or special talents and share it with someone in your world who could benefit.

Select a specific area of growth and development you most desire. Secure a coach, mentor, or other individual to support your progress in this area.

Repeat this exercise often.

“A Teacher Affects…”

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“A teacher affects eternity; he can never tell where his influence stops.”

—Henry Brooks Adams, American historian and member of the Adams political family

Photo from Flickr by Anne Adrian

Photo from Flickr by Anne Adrian

Among the core values explored and discussed with my clients is their fundamental desire and passion to contribute to the lives of others.

When we examine the wide variety of roles each of them play in their professional and personal worlds, the opportunities seem limitless.

Who are the teachers, mentors, coaches, and other life supporters who have made the biggest difference in your life? Where have you noticed yourself “paying forward” valuable lessons to those whom you care about?

EXERCISE:

Where and with whom can you share your knowledge, wisdom, and life lessons to influence the lives of others, and more fully realize your unique contribution to eternity?

“The best teachers are those who…”

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“The best teachers are those who show you where to look, but don’t tell you what to see.”

—Alexandra K. Trenfor

Photo from bats.blogs.nytimes.com

Photo from bats.blogs.nytimes.com

I have been an active and engaged member of the ICF (International Coach Federation) for almost 20 years. Today, this organization has well over 20,000 members in more than 100 countries. The IFC has been one of the most active in establishing the ethics, standards, competencies, and credentialing criteria for the industry.

Fundamental to the value and impact of the coaching process is how it engages the individual in a variety of learning experiences requiring personal inquiry and self-discovery.

A phrase I like very much that describes this client-centered educational effort is “Coaches let their questions do the heavy lifting.” Although teaching experiences that “show and tell” can be a part of the learning process, it is perhaps when we help others to see, discover, and learn from within that even greater benefits are realized.

EXERCISE:

Think back to the teachers, mentors, and coaches in your life who have made the most significant impact in your life. Examine how many of them helped you discover and believe in your own potential and greatness.

How can you be this teacher or coach for those you care about in your professional or personal life?

Should you have the interest to learn more about coaching and the ICF, please visit www.coachfederation.org

“We all have the extraordinary …”

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“We all have the extraordinary coded within us, waiting to be released.”

—Jean Houston, Ph.D., scholar, philosopher and researcher

Photo from Mayo Clinic

Photo from Mayo Clinic

The process of coaching is like being a geneticist. It begins with the fundamental belief in what Dr. Houston states.  Guided by an extensive inquiry, it evolves into a supportive partnership to decipher each person’s special code, and helps them express it in the world.

Consider the discovery of DNA, and the work of scientists sequencing the entire genome with the intention of supporting each individual in living the most extraordinary life possible.

EXERCISE:

How can you be a coach for others and have coaching partnerships supporting you to release and realize the wonders of everyone in your professional and personal communities?

“To strengthen the muscle of your heart the best exercise is lifting someone else’s spirit when you can.”

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“To strengthen the muscle of your heart the best exercise is lifting someone else’s spirit when you can.”

—Author unknown

Photo from Flickr by tiff_ku1

Photo from Flickr by tiff_ku1

Did you know that your heart beats over 100,000 times in one day, and over 35 million times in a year? If you live an average lifetime, your heart will beat more than 2.5 billion times.

Each beat of your heart has about the same force as giving a tennis ball a hard squeeze. This force circulates approximately 5.9 quarts of blood through your body, three times every minute.

Through this constant effort the heart pumps the equivalent of about one million barrels of blood during an average lifetime, which is enough to fill more than three super tankers.

EXERCISE:

How can you exercise your heart today by being a coach, mentor, or friend to others, and lift their spirits higher?

Interview with Doug Gfeller, Part Three: Building an Online Audience, and the Value of Coaching for Individuals and in Organizations

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In this third excerpt (12 mins) from my interview with Doug Gfeller of The Coaching Perspective, we discuss:

  • My strategies for building an online audience, and the value of this, particularly in terms of impact.
  • How a book helps build credibility, even though it’s unlikely to make you a great deal of money.
  • The importance of being found through Google, and how a strong online presence helps with this.
  • How I help business leaders become coaches within their own institution, and how I work with professional coaches.
  • How having a coach and moving your life forward can help those around you, particularly family members.
  • The ways larger organizations are incorporating coaching into their processes.

Click “play” below to listen to this part of the interview:

You can listen to the full interview, and other interviews with me, on the Podcasts page of my coaching website.

When no one is watching

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“The true test of a man’s character is what he does when no one is watching.”

– John Wooden, American basketball coach

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mage from Flickr by Arlington County

I was enterprising as a young boy. At age 11, I mowed lawns during summer and shoveled snow during winter to earn money to purchase things I wanted. One winter day, I was headed out to shovel snow in our neighborhood, and my dad asked me to shovel our elderly next door neighbor’s sidewalk and not charge for the effort.

I must admit I hemmed and hawed, thinking this request unfair, and I remember my dad’s words, “It will build your character.” To this day, I can’t lift a shovel of snow without those words running through my mind.

Exercise:

What are the things you do or could do, without anyone knowing, that contribute to your character?

If you happen to be a coach, mentor, parent, teacher, or other service-oriented individual, how can you share today’s nugget of wisdom with the coach-able people in your life?