Category Archives: Confidence

“What gets better as we age?”

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“What gets better as we age?”

—Author Unknown

Image from Unsplash by Dmitry Mashkin

In the years following my dad’s passing, I’ve developed a far greater interest in the subject of aging.

Although there are many reasons to see these years as ones of decline from our younger selves, there is still plenty of evidence that numerous areas of life tend to improve, including:

  • Happiness and Well-Being: older adults often experience greater life satisfaction and emotional stability, with reduced stress from the responsibilities of raising children and work.
  • Self Confidence: many older individuals become more comfortable in their own skin, embracing their true selves without the need for external validation.
  • Wisdom and Decision-Making: tend to improve through the accumulation of life experiences and more thoughtful informed choices.
  • Empathy and the ability to more deeply understand the emotions and experiences of others tend to improve, like a fine wine with time.

EXERCISE:

How can you see yourself as getting better — not just older — with each passing day?  How might greater mindfulness and self-awareness of the aging process help you experience a richer, more fulfilling life?

Trusting in your natural intelligence and capacities

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Trusting in your natural intelligence and capacities to navigate life can be a source of great confidence.

—Calm App Reflection

Image from Unsplash by Courtney Cook

How often do you lean on others to make it through your day? How frequently do others lean on you to do the same?

Regardless of your answer, if you are reading this post, you’ve made it this far and will likely do so in the future. What have you accomplished along the way?

What obstacles and setbacks have your worked around and overcome?

Exploring these questions may have offered you a booster shot of confidence by recognizing your natural intelligence and capacities to navigate life.

How can you remind yourself in the future when self-doubt creeps in?

EXERCISE:

What internal and external support structures can you use to maintain and expand your store of confidence?

How can you serve as a coach or mentor to support the confidence of others in your communities?

Friday Review: Confidence

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FRIDAY REVIEW: CONFIDENCE

How much confidence do you have in yourself and those around you? Here are a few related posts you may have missed.

“Every small positive change we make in ourselves repays us in confidence in the future.”

 

 

 

 

“A surplus of effort could overcome a deficit of confidence.”

 

 

 

 

“An expert is someone who, over many years, manages to remain confident enough to keep trying and humble enough to keep learning.”

 

 

“An expert is someone who, over many years, manages to remain confident enough to keep trying and humble enough to keep learning.”

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“An expert is someone who, over many years, manages to remain confident enough to keep trying and humble enough to keep learning.”

—James Clear, Author of Atomic Habits

Image of Pablo Casals from britannica.com

When asked why he continued to practice the cello three hours a day at the age of 93, Pablo Casals answered: “I’m beginning to notice some improvement.”

My dad, who passed away last March at the age of 94, loved golf. He took up this pastime at the age of 69 and played three days a week in almost any weather. Although he was not what others would call an expert, you could find him on most days swinging a dinged-up yardstick and putting on his carpet during commercial breaks of the golf channel or a televised tournament.

EXERCISE:

Where in your personal or professional life are you still passionate about enhancing your expertise and mastery?  Where do you remain confident to keep trying and humble enough to keep learning?

“A surplus of effort could overcome a deficit of confidence.”

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“A surplus of effort could overcome a deficit of confidence.”

—Sonia Sotomayor, U.S. Supreme Court Justice

Take a few minutes to reflect on your level of confidence regarding your personal and professional skills, abilities, and talents.

In which areas are you most or least confident?

Examine the levels of effort, practice, and overall experience you have put forth in each of these areas.

What factors seem to be most associated with higher versus lower confidence?

EXERCISE:

Where and on what personal or professional matter would a surplus of effort increase your effectiveness and your confidence?

What actions can and will you take to do just that?

Friday Review of Posts on Confidence

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FRIDAY REVIEW: CONFIDENCE

How much confidence do you have in yourself and those around you? Here are a few confidence-related posts you may have missed. Click the link to read the full message.

 

“Inhale confidence, exhale doubt.”

 

 

 

 

 

“What would an optimistic, confident person do?”

 

 

 

 

“Every small positive change we make in ourselves repays us in confidence in the future.”

 

 

 

Every Small Positive Change We Make in Ourselves

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“Every small positive change we make in ourselves repays us in confidence in the future.”

—Alice Walker, Author of The Color Purple

Image of a man buttoning his suit jacket

Image from Unsplash by Hunters Race

Confidence is a quality most of my clients and the people I meet wish to increase. Although some may not always admit it, I’ve observed over time that most people have an inner critic that lessens their self-worth on many occasions.

For some reason, they often compare themselves to others and see big gaps, with others being far ahead of them. The leap to reach that level can often seem daunting or even impossible.

An alternative to giving up is the moment-to-moment and daily positive efforts for change we can all exercise. In doing so, we move closer to the future we see for ourselves – one step at a time.

EXERCISE:

Select one small positive change you wish to make in your personal or professional world, and stick with it for at least a week. Share your intention and specific action plan with others, so that you can be supported and reminded to stay on course.

If you continue this practice in the weeks, months, and years to come, I bet many of your friends and colleagues will admire the confidence they observe in you.

optimistic people

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“What would an optimistic, confident person do?”

—A. S. Jacobs

Image of smiling man with two thumbs in the air

Image from quotesgram.com

One of the distinct benefits of working with coaches, mentors, and advisors is that they give their clients access to outside, mostly objective perspectives on matters of great importance.

One frequently used tool is the open-ended question, which encourages the exploration of new dimensions of thinking.

At times, almost all of us lack the sunny, confident view on issues that are not turning out as we would like. Asking “What would an optimistic, confident person do?” can lift the dark clouds and pessimistic perspective that often creeps into our thoughts.

EXERCISE:

Select an important issue or matter that is bringing you down. Shine the light of greater optimism and confidence on it, to move you forward to a more desirable outcome.

“Inhale confidence…”

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“Inhale confidence, exhale doubt.”

-Author Unknown

QC #890

The development of greater self-confidence is a high priority for many of the up-and-coming leaders I coach. These high potential individuals have already achieved a level of success, and yet, they are often challenged with a new assignment that requires skills and abilities they often feel they lack.

EXERCISE:

To inhale greater self-confidence and exhale doubt, consider some of the following strategies:

  • Create a list of your current strengths and abilities.
  • Listen, but be skeptical, when dealing with naysayers.
  • Learn to accept compliments graciously.
  • Exercise and become more physically fit.
  • Read positive and self-affirming materials.
  • Avoid associating with negative people.
  • Notice your own inner voice, especially when it is self-critical, and release its negative impact.
  • Always be learning and doing something each day to better yourself.

Feel free to reply to this post with your own confidence-building and doubt-reducing strategies.