Category Archives: Fear

“Fear doesn’t prevent death…”

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“Fear doesn’t prevent death, but it certainly prevents life.”

—Darren Hardy, Publisher of Success Magazine

Photo from Flickr by Juan Pablo Gonzalez

Photo from Flickr by Juan Pablo Gonzalez

Many years ago, I attended a personal development seminar with about 150 people where the presenter asked the participants why most people get up in the morning. Following a variety of expected responses such as “to go to work and make a living,” he gave his own answer.

He said that most people get up in the morning because they did not die in their sleep.

The entire audience was shocked.

His perspective was that a majority of people navigate through their days a bit robotically without any level of excitement, vitality, or enthusiasm.

Fear, he suggested, was a primary reason many of us lower our sights and play it safe. Rather than not being dead, he asked us to look at the question: What does it mean to be fully alive?

EXERCISE:

In what way will you overcome a fear you may have by summoning the courage to be fully alive today?

“Do one thing each day that scares you.”

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“Do one thing each day that scares you.”

—Eleanor Roosevelt, longest-serving First Lady of the United States

Photo from Flickr by Nikki Collett

Photo from Flickr by Nikki Collett

I’m not a big fan of being scared. I don’t care for heights, roller coasters are not on my list of fun activities, and I’m unlikely to go to scary movies. Why are such activities so popular with many people?

Facing my fears gives me a booster shot of “Aliveness.”  When I examine the fears I held as I entered and pursued my career in coaching, these things happened:

  • I resigned from the stability of a Fortune 500 Company, without a salary to support myself, my wife, and my two young children.
  • I spent three months networking and reaching out to people I did not know, with no tangible results.
  • I gave many talks and speeches (public speaking is one of most people’s fears) to numerous groups to create awareness of my services.
  • I tapped into savings to secure an office instead of working from home to save money.

EXERCISE:

What one thing will you do today that scares you and will help you achieve an authentic goal and fulfill more of your highest potential?

“Action conquers fear.”

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 “Action conquers fear.”

– Peter Nivio Zarlenga, author

Over the next day or two, take particular notice of people who are experiencing worry or outright fear – especially if one of those people is you. One thing I bet you notice is the degree of paralysis, procrastination, and inactivity associated with this emotion.

Terms like crippled, frozen, riddled and stuck all point to this debilitating condition.

Simply the act of moving one step at a time helps to break these bonds and frees us once again to move our worlds forward.

Exercise:

Whenever you are experiencing fear, share how you’re feeling with someone immediately, and seek their support to act quickly before the cement of this crippling emotion has a chance to dry.

Forget to be Afraid

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“Become so wrapped up in something that you forget to be afraid.”

–Lady Bird Johnson, Former First Lady of the USA

Image from Pinterest

My journey into the coaching profession is definitely an example of getting so wrapped up in something I almost forgot to be afraid.

At the ripe old age of 35, I threw caution to the wind and left a 12-year career with a Fortune 500 pharmaceutical company to sign up for the job of “coach” with:

1. No salary (You ate what you killed!)
2. No benefits
3. No coaching clients
4. No general agreement about or awareness of the profession – it was truly in its infancy
5. A wife and two young children, plus a considerable mortgage
6. Modest savings, with about 6 months of living expenses

In spite of these factors, I found myself enthusiastic and excited to partner with people and help them achieve breakthroughs in their personal and professional life – just as Olympic athletes work with coaches to achieve their full potential.

Exercise:

What can you be so wrapped up in something that you forget to be afraid?

Our doubts are traitors

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“Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt.”

—William Shakespeare, playwright

image from www.huffingtonpost.ca

I had a hard time reading Shakespeare in high school – I just didn’t fully get it. Maybe it was my impatience or perhaps I can blame my English teacher!

For me, this quote is about how fear stops just about all of us in our tracks. Perhaps if we really, really focus on the good we wish to do, then we will find that secret life lever that will have us try, leap, and attempt, in spite of this fear.

Exercise:

Where is fear keeping you from the good you might do?

Where can you find the courage to overcome this fear and make the attempt?