Tag Archives: beliefs

Men are Not Against You

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“Men are not against you; they’re merely for themselves.”

—Gene Fowler, 20th Century American journalist

Image of Wile E. Coyote and the Road Runner

Image from Lesterbanks

Do you have any enemies? Is there an archnemesis in your personal or professional community? What is it like to be around this person, or even to simply think about them?

What have you done to contribute to the rift between the two of you? What have you tried to perhaps mend fences?

EXERCISE:

Instead of being against one another with all the damage it can produce, how would a better understanding of what this individual stands for help?

Once you better understand their motivators and beliefs, perhaps you can break the vicious cycle of making each other wrong.

the truth you believe in

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“The truth you believe in and cling to makes you unavailable to hear anything new.”

-Pema Chödrön, American Buddhist nun

Image of Pema Chödrön

Image of Pema Chödrön from calmfulliving.com

When was the last time you had a discussion with a friend, family member, or colleague in which they said, “I know” one or more times?

Consider that at such moments their beliefs and opinions are firmly cemented into their minds. Unfortunately, in many cases, they have literally stopped listening to any other perspective.

Turning this situation around, how often do you say “I know” to others, or just covertly think it to yourself?

EXERCISE:

Where and on what subjects are you clinging too tightly to your own point of view or perspective, making you unavailable to new possibilities?

How would an “I don’t know / I’m not sure / I’m curious” perspective create the greatest value?

Friday Review: Beliefs

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FRIDAY REVIEW: BELIEFS

How often do you review and reorganize the beliefs you hold? Here are a few belief-related posts you may have missed. Click on the links to read the full messages.

“A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.”

 

 

 

 

“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”

 

 

 

 

“Reality is the other person’s idea of how things should be.”

 

 

 

 

Believing in you

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“Sometimes you just need to be reminded: ‘You Got This!’”

—Brendon Burchard, American Motivational Author

Image of Olympic Gold Medals. Believing in you

Image from Flickr by Zoe

The 1992 Olympic Games in Barcelona, Spain were my inspiration to become a coach. With the 2016 Olympics right around the corner, we will all see extraordinary efforts and accomplishments. The most exceptional athletes will stand on that platform to receive their medals and hear their national anthem played before the entire world.

If you could jump into a time machine to explore the lives of each of these athletes, you would discover one common factor that contributed to their success. That factor was the faith, commitment, and support of family, friends, and of course, the coaches, who believed in their greatness.

EXERCISE:

Who can you thank today for always believing and having faith in you? Who in your world might experience a difference in their lives from more “You Got This!” messages from you?

Good Example

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“If you can’t be a good example, then you’ll just have to be a horrible warning.”

-Catherine Aird, British Crime Fiction Writer

Image from jarofquotes.com

Image from jarofquotes.com

The other day I had a coaching session with a client regarding his parenting strategies. When he examined the behaviors that worked or didn’t, he looked to his own parent’s example for clues.

This man tends to emulate or copy the attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors of those he admires, and often does the opposite of behaviors he considered as horrible parenting.

EXERCISE:

How can you benefit most from examples set by others to coach yourself toward a more successful professional and personal life?

Where can adjustments in the examples you set coach your children as well as others in your life to lead more successful lives of their own?

What I Might Be

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“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”

—Lao Tzu, Chinese philosopher

Image from beyouonlybetter.com

Image from beyouonlybetter.com

We all want to be ‘right’ – to have the correct answer, to know the truth. We think that will bring us clarity, stability, and peace of mind.

But what if being ‘right’ only serves to put us in a safe and limiting box?

When we define something, we limit it. Perhaps we could instead distinguish ourselves by being open to the possibility of who we could be rather than placing limits on who we are.

EXERCISE:

How and in what ways can you disengage from self-limiting beliefs?

If you find this difficult, ask a family member or close friend for their perspective.

“A great many people think…”

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“A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.”

—William James, 19th Century American philosopher

Image from sites.bu.edu

Image from sites.bu.edu

The term “prejudice” carries negative connotations for most people. We see numerous examples related to prejudice when we watch the local, national, and global news.

Few consider themselves prejudiced. “That label applies to the short-sighted individuals out there, not to me.”

Today’s quote points to the fact that our everyday thinking is actually a form of prejudice that helps us navigate our world, on the one hand, and which can limit us on the other hand.

EXERCISE:

How often do you find yourself exploring new ways of thinking, or trying on views other than those you have held for years?

What would be possible, and what value could you create, if you were to rearrange your prejudices?

“The trouble with the rat race is…”

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“The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win you’re still a rat.”

-Lily Tomlin, American actress, comedian, writer, and producer

Photo from Flickr by Tim

Photo from Flickr by Tim

One of the unique parts of my work as a coach is that I have significant freedom to work with the people I choose. This freedom of choice has multiple benefits, including better results and far more mutually satisfying relationships.

Before any coaching begins, I utilize a discovery process to weed out the potential rats that are not the best fit to work with me.

I clearly do not wish to offend anyone by calling them a rat, however, we all find some people far easier and more enjoyable to work with due to common values, beliefs, and commitments. The ability to seek out such individuals allows us to not only win more races, but also to enjoy the run regardless of the results.

EXERCISE:

How can you use your values, beliefs, and authentic commitments to partner with others to more fully enjoy more of your professional and personal races?

“Awareness is the greatest agent for change.”

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“Awareness is the greatest agent for change.”

-Eckhart Tolle, Canadian Author and Spiritual Leader

 

Photo from Flickr by Miguelanger Guedez

Photo from Flickr by Miguelanger Guedez

Although we live in a world that is constantly changing, I would suggest that much of our internal worlds remain the same.

Examine your own attitudes and beliefs about the world around you and you will likely notice that most have remained relatively constant for years, and perhaps throughout your entire life.

Examination and internal exploration are key in enhancing our journey of self-awareness. This  allows us to determine if and to what extent our long-standing beliefs and perspectives serve us optimally.

In the event they do not, this new awareness can act as an agent of change as Eckhart Tolle suggests.

EXERCISE:

What daily habits, rituals, behaviors, and practices can aid you in the development of your awareness muscles, that support positive change in your professional or personal life?

Here are some strategies to consider:

  • Journaling
  • Meditating
  • Prayer
  • Reflective walks in nature
  • Reflective forms of exercise, such as Yoga
  • Deep Breathing

Feel free to reply to this message to share your own self-awareness practices.