When we can lay down our fear and anger and choose responses other than aggression,

“When we can lay down our fear and anger and choose responses other than aggression, we create the conditions for bringing out the best in us humans.”

Margaret Wheatley, American writer, speaker, and management consultant

Image from Unsplash by Ditto Bowo

To what degree are these times bringing out the worst in us as humans?

How much fear, anger, and aggression have you seen in the media and your communities over the past several months?

Consider Victor Frankl‘s statement: Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.

EXERCISE:

In what ways can you choose to keep a cool and level head in these turbulent times?

How can you mindfully choose more appropriate responses to the hotheads around you, to bring out the best in yourself and others?

Where and when is it time to walk away from things not meant for you?

Where and when is it time to walk away from things not meant for you?

—Calm App Reflection

Image from Unsplash by Kelli McClintock

When we’re young it seems like we have all the time in the world to do whatever we like. Wasting time was clearly for the older set and their efforts to be responsible and productive.

As we age, it appears that many of us get the message, and we begin examining how we spend our precious time becomes a much higher priority.

Just as you would not continue eating a buffet item you didn’t care for, walking — or even running — away from people and things that don’t suit your tastes seems a wise choice to feed and fuel us moving forward.

EXERCISE:

Where in your personal and professional life would it be wise to stop engaging with people and pursuits clearly not meant for you?

When you don’t know what to do, do nothing, be still

“When you don’t know what to do, do nothing, be still.”

Oprah Winfrey, American talk show host, TV producer, actress, author, and media proprietor

Image from Unsplash by Riccardo Annandale

I found myself with a case of writer’s block with this quote.

Thinking of interesting and pithy things to pen on a daily basis is confronting when you have a lot going on in the rest of your life.

Being still in a world that moves so fast is a challenge.

How can we get anywhere or accomplish a goal if we don’t make our intentions real through action?

Feeling stuck in this moment, I decided to do nothing, as Oprah suggests.

Suddenly, a light bulb moment struck.

Being still is doing something that leaves space for other somethings to show up. And so this post came to be.

EXERCISE:

Where in your life would stopping in your tracks and being still allow something unexpected and new to show up?

There are many paths to the same destination

There are many paths to the same destination. When one path is blocked, we simply choose another. How many WAZE are available to you at this moment?

—Calm App Reflection

Image from Unsplash by Brett Jordan

The other day I needed to drive from my home outside Philadelphia into the center city district during rush hour. Knowing this, I opened the WAZE app to determine when I needed to leave to provide me a safe margin of time to keep my white-knuckle stress to a minimum.

Although the bee-line distance was only around 25 miles, the time and turns it took was mind boggling.

In all my years, I had never seen the streets and neighborhoods that eventually took us to our destination.

EXERCISE:

How do you navigate your various paths through life when faced with roadblocks and detours?

What strategies do you use to reach your destinations when your usual routes are not available?

“When you spend serious time and effort on transcendental things, it puts your little world into…

“When you spend serious time and effort on transcendental things, it puts your little world into proper context and takes the focus off yourself.”

Arthur C. Brooks, American author and speaker

Image from Unsplash by Chang Duong

The few months we recently spent in Florida have been revealing in two significant ways:

The first is how often we design our lives from the outside in.

The second is that we have even more opportunities to design our lives from the inside out.

The warmer climate definitely offers us greater freedom from the choice of clothes we wore to the time we spent outdoors. Both increased the likelihood of daily exercise and the enjoyment of nature.

Spending time in our senior community also helped me see how people’s priorities shift as they age.

Although there is always a bit of gossip and the focus on little things, most people seemed far more interested in what was most significant and meaningful given the finite nature of their lives.

EXERCISE:

How and where are you spending your precious time as the days and years go by?

Where and how could more transcendental things fit into this picture?

Friday Review: Decisions

Friday Review: Decisions

What decisions have you made regarding 2024? Here are a few related posts you may have missed.

Decide to decide and then take the leap. You will land on your feet more than you think.

 

 

 

 

“The majority of meetings should be discussions that lead to decisions.”

 

 

 

The Latin root of the word “decision” literally means “to cut.”

 

 

 

 

 

“Don’t swing at every pitch. Wait for the right ones and then knock them out of the park.”

“Don’t swing at every pitch. Wait for the right ones and then knock them out of the park.”

Rohan Rajiv, author of A Learning a Day Blog

Image from Unsplash by Josh Hemsley

I recently had the opportunity to observe two different sporting events on the same weekend.

One—as you might guess from today’s quote—was baseball. The other was tennis.

When I compared the two, I noticed a significant difference.

In tennis, the receiving player tries to return every serve that makes it into the service area, no matter how fast or how much spin it may have.

In baseball, the batter has a number of chances to be more selective on when to swing at what’s being offered by the pitcher.

EXERCISE:

Where do you find yourself swinging at every pitch coming your way?

How often do you strike out or get on base, given your ability to discern which pitches are right for you?

How would more practice increase your batting average and add more home runs to your stats?

See the humanity in others. We are all wrestling with our own stuff

See the humanity in others. We are all wrestling with our own stuff that is making life messy and difficult.

—Calm App Reflection

Image from Unsplash by Bud Helisson

To a certain degree we are all narcissists. We can’t help but look through the lenses of our own trials and challenges each day. Doing this can often create a separation between ourselves and others in our communities. We can come to think that the burdens we carry are somehow unique to us and are of far greater magnitude.

I recently watched the National Geographic series 9/11 One Day in America. and got a big wake up call at how our troubles pale in comparison. I’ve also realized in the past few years since Covid the wrestling done by most people is far more than I ever imagined.

EXERCISE:

To what degree do you take the time to fully embrace the humanity in others? Take a few extra moments today to be interested rather than interesting and see what you discover.

We aren’t stuck with our factory settings

We aren’t stuck with our factory settings.

—Calm App Reflection

Image from Unsplash by Mika Baumeister

What are your favorite digital distractions?

How much time do you spend on your computer, TV, or cell phone?

To what degree do you accept the factory settings installed on your devices? In what ways have you taken the time to customize the settings to your preferences?

Looking beyond technology, where else might there be “factory settings” within your world?

Consider all the programing installed without your knowledge throughout your personal world, including family dynamics and your schooling.

What about your work life including its culture, organizational rules and guidelines—not to mention the good old job description?

EXERCISE:

In what ways can you take a closer look at the factory settings established in your personal and professional communities?

What adjustments can you make to help you lead a more colorful and vibrant life?

Although the best coaching may be offered by good examples

Although the best coaching may be offered by good examples the next best may be found in bad examples. It is up to each of us to discover the lessons in both.

—Calm App Reflection

Who are the people in your life that set a wonderful example of living a rich and meaningful life?

How would you describe their character and best qualities?

How has their example impacted and influenced your personal and professional efforts?

Where in your world do you see terrible examples of how to live?

Where do you see people acting in ways that are contrary to what you value and believe?

How have their bad examples taught you valuable lessons that led you on a far better path?

EXERCISE:

Take an extra close look at the good and bad examples exemplified by people in your various communities.

What new or different choices and actions will you make and take from these observations?