“Be a voice, not an echo.”

Posted on October 19, 2015 by Barry

“Be a voice, not an echo.”

-attributed to Albert Einstein

Image from Flickr by Shawn Harquail

For many years I have been a fan of TED talks. The subtitle for these 15-20 minute presentations is “Ideas Worth Spreading.” In recent years, this format has expanded worldwide through the TEDx format. Most major cities have held numerous conferences where local leaders and influencers give voice to their best ideas.

In a world of social media and sound bites, many of us often find ourselves reposting and retweeting, echoing ideas from others that certainly inform and entertain.

EXERCISE:

Where and in what ways can you better capture your voice and share your best ideas with others in your professional and personal communities?

If you were asked to give your own TED talk, what topic would you choose?

“When you are a parent…”

Posted on October 14, 2015 by Barry

“When you are a parent, it’s crucial you realize you aren’t raising a ‘mini-me,’ but a spirit throbbing with its own signature.”

-Dr. Shefali Tsabary, keynote speaker and author

Photo from Flickr by Aaron Brinker

I love the idea of all parents having masterful coaching skills to support the growth and development of their children. The primary reason for this opinion is the fact that coaching is primarily an inside-out approach, which is often far more desirable and effective than an outside-in approach.

I’ve found through my own parenting efforts that both my children appreciated and flourished in their development when they had input and some influence on their lives. In other words, people – including young people – are more likely to participate in that which they help create.

EXERCISE:

How can you use a coaching approach in your parenting efforts to bring out the unique signatures of your children? If you are not a parent, how can you use an inside-out coaching approach to support others in your personal or professional worlds?

“A good deed brightens…”

Posted on October 8, 2015 by Barry

“A good deed brightens a dark world.”

—Author Unknown

Image from fridaylight.org

Imagine you are standing in a pitch-black room in which you cannot see your hand in front of your face.

A person enters the room with a lit candle. You can now see your hand, and of course, the smiling face of your visitor. Soon a second, third, and fourth individual join you, each bringing their own candle to further illuminate your room.

Many times, when we look at our lives, the lives of others, and the world in general, things can appear dark and foreboding. We might not even see a light at the end of the tunnel.

EXERCISE:

Where and with whom can you offer your own good deeds to brighten up the world of those around you? Please note how often this process brightens your own world as well!
Imagine the brightness and illumination if everyone focused on doing this more, each and every day.

“In the game of life, it is wise…”

Posted on October 7, 2015 by Barry

“In the game of life, it is wise to refrain from keeping score.”

—Author Unknown

Image from empowerenlightenenvision.com

As a business coach, most clients engage my services to support them in achieving the objectives and results they desire.

On many occasions, as today’s quote recommends, I suggest that they refrain from keeping score.

Consider these few additional quotes related to marriage, friendships, and relationships:

“Marriage is not a contest. Never keep score. God has put the two of you together on the same team, to win.”

“A friend is someone who does things that count, but doesn’t stop to count them.”

“Relationships aren’t for getting things. They are for giving things. Never fall in love to make yourself happy. Fall in love to make the person you fall in love with happy.”

EXERCISE:

Where has the habit of keeping score limited or challenged your personal or professional relationships? Where and with whom is it wiser to be more generous, and refrain from keeping score?

“Our fingerprints don’t fade from…”

Posted on October 5, 2015 by Barry

“Our fingerprints don’t fade from the lives we’ve touched.”

—Will Fetters, American Screenwriter

Image from lynnemosher.com

I’ve been fortunate over the years to build a coaching practice in which I often see clients in person in my office. Sessions are held at a special round table covered with glass. By the end of the day, the glass is often covered with fingerprints, along with a few crumbs if we happen to meet over lunch.

Perhaps the most profound reason the profession of coaching has grown so significantly over the years is the stickiness and sustainability attributed to these special, collaborative relationships.

EXERCISE:

Where can you make an enduring and lasting impact in the lives of others? Who are the people who have made an enduring and lasting impact on your life? How can you continue to positively build on these “life fingerprints” and only bring out the “glass cleaner” to remove the smudges that sometimes come your way?

“If the world is cold, make it…”

Posted on September 30, 2015 by Barry

“If the world is cold, make it your business to build fires.”

—Horace Traubel, 20th Century American Essayist

Image from www.offthegridnews.com

The life blood of any business is satisfied customers who are attracted to you as well as your products or services.

The goal of business development or outreach efforts is to convert the unaware or “cold” prospect to a hot prospect, and to eventually consummate a win-win agreement. In our frenetic, over-communicative world, this is often easier said than done.

One strategy I found that will definitely warm things up for you is to create a discovery process that intentionally seeks to establish the fit and value of a future agreement.

EXERCISE:

Create an assessment that specifically identifies the best candidates for your product or service. Create another assessment that helps people determine the value and areas of impact of your product or service.

Feel free to examine the Assessment Section of my website to see how I help prospects determine the fit and value of working together. Consider adapting these resources to support your own efforts.

“Respect yourself enough to walk away…”

Posted on September 23, 2015 by Barry

“Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy.”

-Robert Tew, Australian, Chairman at Newcastle Knights Limited

Image from Flickr by Oleg Sidorenko

Today’s quote is a pretty good barometer for progressing in life. Mr. Tew calls on us to fully open our eyes and hearts to determine what is and is not working at this point in time.

Take the opportunity to dig deeply into the ideas of service, growth, and happiness to not take the simple way out of your evolving self. Then, and only, then, make a beeline for the door!

EXERCISE:

Where in your personal or professional life is it time to walk away from certain people, events, or circumstances, in order to gain greater self-respect?

“We have a tendency to want…”

Posted on September 22, 2015 by Barry

“We have a tendency to want the other person to be a finished product while we give ourselves the grace to evolve.”

-T.D. Jakes, Apostle/Bishop of The Potter’s House

Image from responsiveuniverse.me

How guilty are you of having a double standard regarding the people in your personal and professional worlds?

How often do you hold people to some form of ideal to which few ever match up? How often do you use this same standard of excellence as a measure of your own efforts, behaviors, and achievements?

EXERCISE:

If you are in the smallest way guilty of this double standard, examine the costs it may have in key relationships. What adjustment can you make in your perception and point of view to accept and embrace that we are all “works in progress”?

“Speak in such a way that others…”

Posted on August 27, 2015 by Barry

“Speak in such a way that others love to listen to you. Listen in such a way that others love to speak to you.”

—Author Unknown

Image from beyond.com

One thing I know for sure is that quality relationships result when our focus is on others rather than ourselves.

Being interested rather than interesting will channel your listening and speaking skills, to help you successfully navigate your professional and personal worlds.

EXERCISE:

Choose your words today, so that they resonate at the frequency others hear and appreciate. How can you tune into the messages and signals of those around you, so that you fully honor and show how important they are to you?

“I wonder how many people…”

Posted on June 18, 2015 by Barry

“I wonder how many people I’ve looked at all my life and never seen.”

-John Steinbeck, American Author

Image from differencebetween.info

What is the difference between looking at something, and truly seeing it?

Whether it’s a painting or a person, my sense is that the differences can be great or small, considering the circumstance.

Great art, and in the case of today’s quote, the art of relationship creation and sustainability, requires a level of mastery seldom available to the paint-by-number novice.

EXERCISE:

Where can you place the time and effort to gain the depth of connection, cooperation, and collaboration you desire in your professional and personal lives, through more seeing and less looking?