Keep out of the suction

“Keep out of the suction caused by those who drift backwards.”

—attributed to E. K. Piper

Image of a boat being sucked into a whilrpool

Image from Pinterest

When I was in my early teens, I hung out with friends at the local bowling alley. Beyond pursuing our mastery of bowling, we also rode bikes, played wall ball, stick ball, hand ball, wire ball, and a game called “Chink,” which also included a ball.

Back then, if you had a ball, you were guaranteed entertainment all day.

When some of the older friends started driving and hormones kicked in, things began to shift. Their behaviors and language became unacceptable to the values I was taught by my parents and teachers. I could actually feel the negative backward drifts whenever I was encouraged to behave in similar ways.

EXERCISE:

Where do you currently feel the suction of selected individuals in either your personal or professional communities?

What steps must you take to eliminate this backward draft so you can continue pursuing your best future self?

Friday Review: Values

Friday Review: Values

What are the values on which you base your choices in life? Here are a few value-related posts you may have missed. Click on the Quote to read the full message:

QC #1026a

“Above all, be true to yourself, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it.” 

 

 

 

 

QC #1026b

“Character is like a tree and reputation like its shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing.” 

 

 

 

QC #1026c

“It’s always worthwhile to make others aware of their worth.”

 

 

 

 

 

“Values are critical guides for making decisions. When in doubt, they cut through the fog like a beacon in the night.”

“Values are critical guides for making decisions. When in doubt, they cut through the fog like a beacon in the night.”

—Robert Townsend (attrib.)

486

Image from Flickr by briant87

I am reading A Lapsed Anarchist’s Approach to Building a Great Business, by Ari Weinzweig. He is the co-owner of Zingerman’s, located near the University of Michigan’s campus in Ann Arbor.

This book contains a wide variety of essays that show how Zingerman’s became what Bo Burlingham from Inc magazine refers to as “the coolest small company in America.”

Townsend’s quote speaks to the very heart of what makes Zingerman’s, with now over 500 employees, a great place to eat and work.

Exercise:

Google Zingerman’s to do a bit of research into how their values guide their decisions and why they are famous for “the Zingerman experience.” You can even use their mail-order business at zingermancommunity.com to get a literal taste for yourself.

be true to yourself

“Above all, be true to yourself, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it.”

– Hardy D. Jackson

Image from imgion.com

Image from imgion.com

Have you ever felt disconnected and off your game? How does this feeling differ from being in the zone and experiencing flow?

What if you had the ability to shift from disconnect to flow, and stay there for longer periods of time?

Exercise:

Create a list of your fundamental guiding principles for living. Google this subject to see what others have written, and collect the seven to twelve principles that resonate best for you. Display these principles in multiple places in your life, as a reminder of what is in your heart.

If you are presented with an experience or situation that does not fit with these beliefs, take yourself out of it.

 

You cannot talk your way out of something you behaved yourself into.”

“You cannot talk your way out of something you behaved yourself into.”

—Stephen Covey, self-help author

Image from Unsplash by Roman Melnychuk

Actions speak louder than words. They are all we really have to make our dreams of a better future become our reality.

Consider a business leader who consistently touts his core values and corporate vision, yet is seen by his colleagues to act inconsistently with these beliefs. Consider the individual who is constantly discussing his interest in health and wellness, but is often seen making unhealthy eating choices and is rarely seen engaged in physical activity.

Exercise:

Where in life can you bring greater alignment between your actions and your words?

To whom–besides yourself–will you make these promises, and what added support will be required to ensure this new level of personal accountability?

Be who you are

“Be who you are, say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”

– Dr. Seuss, children’s author

Be authentic. Or, as Shakespeare said it, “To thine own self be true.”

But what if people don’t like us, or even reject us? There has never been a person who  pleased everyone. The best we can do is to please first ourselves and then those in our lives who truly matter.

Stop being a chameleon, constantly trying to change in order to please those around you. In fact, it is the natural human state of things to become more of who you truly are.

Exercise:

Determine what you value, what really makes you tick and your fundamental beliefs – and shout them from the rooftops. The people who matter will pick up your signal, and those who don’t were never really tuned in the first place.

#41: “If I am walking with two other men, each of them will serve as my teacher…”

“…I will pick out the good points of the one and imitate them, and the bad points of the other and correct them in myself.”

– Confucius, Chinese philosopher

I have a passion for learning and personal growth. My personal antenna and receiver are often on high alert to the knowledge, wisdom and behavior of others.

One of my favorite questions to ask coaching clients is “how would you describe your best future self?” If they are unclear about the meaning of this question, I often suggest that they identify the qualities of the people they admire – such as integrity, courage, loyalty, and enthusiasm. They can also identify the qualities that they least admire – such as greed, dishonesty, arrogance, and pessimism.

Exercise:

Who are the people that can help you discover and develop your best future self? What are their qualities (good or bad)?

Where can you begin your future journey today?

Quotes are posted on The Quotable Coach a week after being sent out by email. To get the latest quotes straight to your inbox, pop your details in the sidebar to the right.

“A man should conceive of a legitimate purpose in his heart and set out to accomplish it.”

“A man should conceive of a legitimate purpose in his heart and set out to accomplish it.”

– James Allen, philosopher and writer

Life purpose, making a difference, and living a meaningful life are fundamental to happiness.

How can you find your purpose and life direction? How will you know when you are heading the right way, and when you’re getting close to arriving?

Exercise:

List your top 20 – 30 core values.

Cut this list in half, and then in half again, to get to the real core.

Next, create a life vision statement, using all of the final list and perhaps most of the second list of values. Wordsmith this vision until you feel it is 100% you.

Now use your vision statement as the context to inspire your actions in every area of your life: it can help you become happier and more fulfilled.